Each week, The Residents asks a Wellington local to describe their typical, capital day.
7:00 - I normally sleep through the alarm quite badly; its a battle. When I get up its always a rush. There are 2 things I need to do. I need to take Ritalin (I have ADHD - if I don't take it I can't function in my life). Then I have to have my gym gear. I have huge handbags. It's like a circus every morning with me. Then I put on half my makeup and head out the door because I am already running late for work.
8:00 - I get to work, make a coffee and joke with the people I work with. We have a weird sense of humour because they are software developers - it's nerdy. There is usually chaos in my inbox, because at Xero there is the London team and the US team. There's a lot going on.
8:20 - 8:25 - I sneak off to the bathroom to finish my makeup. Otherwise I will have one eyebrow in meeting.
8:30 - 11:00 - I have a list of issues that I need to investigate. These can take up a lot of my brain. I put headphones on so I can zone in.
11:00 - Check the news. If something annoys me, I will do something, like update my Facebook. For instance, I did this for the Tony Vietch thing recently. Then everything blows up. My phone is ringing, twitter is going crazy, Women's Refuge is on the phone. A lot of people are getting really passionate.
2:00 - I never get anything much of a lunch break, so by 2 I need to eat. I try to eat healthy so I run to Wishbone and get these chicken curry laksa soups - they're insane. Or I go to Enigma on Courtenay Place and get something there. Sometimes if I am losing it I will sit by myself for a bit at Enigma, but normally I just grab it and go back to work.
If I end up taking someone for a meeting for lunch, I take them to 5 Boroughs or Yum Cha at Dragons - its old school. Dead chicken feet? Roll them out. Usually its for interviews, or meeting about lip-sync - the second career.
2:15 - 2:30 - I can't let social media to get in the way of my life, so sometimes I need to stay at work to finish comedy stuff off. I have to be on for work at Xero. At 5pm the other week, David Farrier sent me a request to write up about my Tony Veitch post.
5:30 - Its super important for me to stay fit, so I smash over to Les Mills and do a class.
7:00 - I get home and frantically write down a list of things for a gig, put on makeup, get dressed. Maybe have a beer. I then walk down to a gig at San Fran, Bats or Fringe Bar, or somewhere. If I am MC-ing or headlining, it more work.
10:30 - The gig is over but if its comedy festival, I will go out after. But if it is a normal gig, when it finishes about 10:30 I will go home, make scrambled eggs on toast but sometimes I get a burrito on the way home. I get home at 11 on a good night.
11:30 - I pack a gym bag for the next day and try and unwind. I am usually still super wired. I fake tan to calm down. Its strangely very relaxing.It's the closest I have to a routine.
Midnight - My room has to be tidy and clean before I go to bed, so sometimes I vaccum before I go to sleep. I watch a makeup video, which is perfect. They are not taking about cloud software or feminism or anything hard. They talk about makeup and contouring and eye lash glue. It turns off my brain for me.
1:00 am - I go to sleep. And the next day the battle with my alarm starts again.